"Why did I do that?
"I did it for two reasons: first and foremost, I grossly overestimated the success and reach of my book and feared my brother or I being pursued for some kind of questioning. In hindsight, there was really no need to worry in that respect; my humble little book is far from a best-seller.
"Secondly, however, I think I did it due to the stigma attached to alcohol abuse – or alcohol dependency, or alcoholism, whatever you want to call it. I knew I wanted to share my story, to raise awareness and to help others. But on some level I was equally scared of putting myself out there and exposing what really went on in our house. I didn’t see it as a stigma back then, in fact I don’t think I really knew what I was worried about exactly – but I was definitely concerned by what people would think of my parents and, by extension, of me.
"Back then whenever I had to share my story in conversation I used to worry about what my friends would think of me. I even used to worry what my fiancée would think – despite us having been together for years and her already knowing much of what I had been through. It still used to worry me that she might somehow think less of me or have reservations about what the future me might evolve into.
"As it happens, most people think more of you for what you’ve coped with, and that’s how it should be. But still – there’s a dangerous stigma attached to alcohol dependency, even today. That stigma is what kept me silent about the pain I suffered for so many years. It doesn’t only affect the drinker; stigma stops whole families affected by drinking from getting support and starting to heal. We as a society need to change how we think about addictions, or we risk causing even more harm.