When people try to change their drinking, they usually focus on the drink itself. In our minds, it is like alcohol is the “villain” in the story, and we have to fight against it. But in my experience as a medical doctor, the drink is rarely the real issue. Just like in any story, the hero must overcome an internal challenge deep within themselves, and only then can they overcome the villain and finish their quest. That internal challenge is the habit we have built in our brains over years.
September 2026 |
Dr Jeevan on why the drink is rarely the real point.
Overcoming a drinking habit is less about drinking, and more about habits.
Habits are automatic behaviours that are triggered unconsciously by things that happen in our environment, or feelings we have inside.
Many of our daily behaviours are automatic habits, from brushing our teeth in the morning to switching the lights off before bed, and everything in-between. We do them unconsciously, without even thinking. Some of us have developed a habit of drinking when something specific happens in our daily lives. Often it’s when we have some type of negative feeling. Some drink when they feel tired after work, some drink when they feel stressed after an argument with their partner and some drink when they feel anxious in social situations.
Over years of repeating that behaviour in the same situations, a strong habit is built. You automatically drink when you get that feeling, often without even realising. Then drinking becomes automatic and it becomes very hard to consciously stop, even when you really want to.
Habits get stronger when there’s a reward
Alcohol is one of many common vices that can form very strong habits in our brains. Alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, vapes, video games, social media, junk food, gambling and most other similar “addictive” activities have something in common. These behaviours give a very strong, and immediate, positive feeling when you do them, like there’s an immediate “hit”.
In psychology, that feeling of a “hit” is called a feeling of reward.
Certain behaviours create a bigger reward feeling in the brain, and drinking alcohol is only one of them. When a behaviour gives a reward, the brain releases dopamine to strengthen the brain circuit for that specific behaviour. That brain circuit becomes stronger, so it’s easier to repeat that behaviour later and get the same reward feeling. Over multiple repetitions, the brain circuit becomes very strong, and the behaviour becomes so easy that it becomes an automatic habit. The stronger the reward the behaviour gives, the stronger the habit can be. This is very similar to training a dog with a treat. It is easier to train a new behaviour with a treat than without one.
Getting to the root of the problem
Alcohol, like the other strong habits mentioned previously, causes a strong feeling of reward in our brains. Those behaviours allow us to escape the negative feelings we have, in that moment. The internal challenge is identifying the specific negative feelings we have, that are the triggers for our automatic drinking habit. Whether it’s stress, tiredness, anxiety, sadness or loneliness, most of us have a feeling that is the trigger.
Each of these feelings aren’t signs of weakness, they are signs that you are not meeting one of your basic human needs. For example, tiredness is when you have not met your need for rest, and loneliness is when you have not met your need for human connection. Alcohol helps us escape those feelings, but it does not solve the root of the problem - those basic human needs still need to be met.
If we are going to reduce the drinking habit, we can take two approaches:
Firstly, when our lives have an unmet need, we can add something externally to build up that area of our lives. For example, if someone’s drinking trigger is loneliness, then joining a new hobby or sport may meet that need in a healthy way. If someone’s drinking trigger is tiredness, building in an earlier bedtime may give them the additional rest they need.
But sometimes there may not be something external we can build into our lives to “solve” our unmet need. Sometimes life is particularly stressful, and there is nothing we can do to change it at that time. We need to choose alternative behaviours when we feel stressed, whether that is going to the gym, going for a walk, calling a friend or anything that helps us to feel positive when we’re down, but in a much healthier way.
Alcohol is not the enemy, the real challenge is within ourselves. We are humans and have needs. We just need to choose behaviours that meet our needs in a healthier way.
