I was an unhappy child and anxious adolescent; plagued with intrusive thoughts. Like many British children of the 1950s and 1960s, my parents had been young adults or children during World War II. Although it seemed like a long time ago to me, it was like yesterday to them. There was a lot of shouting and screaming and I spent my childhood 'walking on eggshells'.
I first got properly drunk when I was aged 15 in 1977. I found the alcohol made me feel free and in control for a brief but satisfying time.
In the 1970’s where I lived there were a lot of pubs and not much else to do be go to them. Drinking was acceptable, even a mark of manhood. I loved the feel of cool liquid down my throat and the relief that a few pints bought me. Even the hangovers dulled my anxiety and cut out the noise of intrusive thoughts. I also had a stressful job, and it seemed reasonable to have a few drinks after a hard day.
I am now 60 something and my life is much easier but the old habits stick.
I have been using the Try Dry® app for three years now. Until this year my alcohol diary petered out by March or April. This year I have kept it going all year so far (October as I write).
Having a month off has really challenged the feeling that I need alcohol and that something bad will happen if I don't have it. My habits have become much more flexible and my urges are more in control. I had a drink twice during the month of January, which I don't regret as it helped me personally not to drink the next day.
Now it is October there have been ups and downs, but keeping a detailed account of how much I have drunk has meant denial is much harder. I drank more in the summer and around birthdays and social occasions but I was able to rein it in the following month. The app’s calendar diary shows you when you drank and how much and gives you a total for the month, year, or the whole time you have been recording.
I have learnt from my reading that there can be fragmented ‘parts’ of you that goad you into drinking but there are also ‘parts’ that cover up and excuse what you have done so you don’t feel bad. It sounds crazy but I have said many times, ‘never again’ with my drinking, and before you know it there I am. The idea that we exist in separate and sometimes competing or antagonistic parts makes so much sense to me. That is why, for me, keeping a diary makes it much harder for the denial parts to get any traction.
Specific to January and going a month without alcohol, the Try Dry® app can give you a real boost when it gets hard. You can look at the calendar/diary, see how well you are doing and remind future you that waking up fresh and alert will feel better than a brief woozy hour or two now. When you input,” stayed dry” the next day, the app gives a little celebration with digital confetti.
I will be doing the Dry January® challenge in 2026 and bring all the things I have learnt from 2025. Good luck everyone.
